Moving to new york was a huge turning point in my life. As anyone in New York knows Pentecostal churches are few and far between. I did have help finding one through a youth minister of mine. It was about an hour away from where I lived. And their church services were literally ALL DAY. Not just a few hours in the morning, but ALL DAY. As in 6 in the morning until 6 at night all day. To me this was too long, and if they needed it good, but I sure didn’t.
Then I got a girlfriend. A Christian girl, her name Kristen. And boy, did I sin with her. But I would repent each time, and apologize to god for falling to temptation and for him to give me strength. Yet I continued to ‘fornicate’ with her throughout my high-school career in new york.
I started going to her church every Sunday. It was Lutheran I believe. It was in Maybrook, which is about 6 miles south of where I lived in Walden. The Pastor was an army chaplain who I got into a few different debates with on the scripture and how he needed to tell these people the truth. I’m sure it could go without saying, but he didn’t care for me too much.
Eventually I stopped going to church. I didn’t need it. My own interpretation of the bible is god inspired, and that’s all I needed. I dove into my bible on my own time, and started noticing little contradictions, parts that didn’t make sense. Then I read the book of Joshua Beginning to End.
I started noticing The atrocities in the bible being committed in the name of God. I started noticing the downright evil things that God commanded his people. I prayed and prayed on to why this was. And I felt god told me that because the words were written by man, and that men are fallible, they aren’t accurate portrayals of god’s will. They got it wrong. This happened in a very cryptic dream.
I shed my christian label and then moved on to being agnostic. There is a God, but it is impossible to prove he exists and the bible has it wrong. During this time I moved back to Texas, and then BACK to new york to be with that Girl, Kristen. We Lived together in Hamilton New York for awhile. One of my roommates Rebecca, was Wiccan. I was like, “Holy crap! EVIL!” right? But soon realized how foolish I was. And I learned from her, and ended up taking on the Title of Wicca. I Even gave tarot card readings… and I was accurate. I’ve witnesses, one of whom I live with currently. These readings took place before I knew what I was doing was called Cold Reading, a technique Magicians and Mentalists use… and well, I am a Magician so I was predisposed to use this technique, unknowingly.
I ended up moving back to Texas, and shed all religious titles. I got married, to the beautiful woman in the photo above, Found out about cold reading, etc. It wasn’t until about 2 months ago from now (Now: 2/8/2012). I came to the conclusion that I didn’t believe in God, because the lack of evidence for his existence.
Many ask me, “How!? You spoke in tongues, you talked to god! You heard him speak!” At first I struggled with this, but I ask, what is more likely, That the laws of physics and nature were suspended in a moment, for me, in my favor or that I’m mistaken?
Speaking in tongues can be explained, and for me it was learned behavior. Google ‘Glossolalia’. I heard god speak, we all hear voices in our heads from time to time. People hallucinate. It Happens. These events are not proof of god.
After accepting my ascension into atheism I found out about Christopher Hitchens. This man could debate. And quite frankly i am looking forward to reading his books. He and Richard Dawkins make a great case against religion and god. I love it. And well, I have since become an anti-theist. This is my story into Atheism. I know it was boring, but this is the point of view I will be discussing things from on this blog, and hopefully I’ll be able to entertain or inform you throughout this new Journey I am embarking.
These are my broken analysis.